Looking How I Look: A Job Search Consideration

When I look how I look (not white, nor black), my first thought goes immediately to the recruiter or hiring person’s first impression of me. Yes, even in 2026. Sometimes.

I would have hoped that how I look is no longer relevant. But if a recent conversation with my mentee is any indication, the topic is very much alive, unfortunately and disappointingly, for those of us affected.

A few months ago, a friend asked how I identified. “Irish American,” I said only half playfully. I say “only half” because I was adopted by an Irish American family, grew up celebrating all things Catholic and Irish and eating corned beef and cabbage like any good Irish American. In fact, at a recent family wedding, my cousins and I were singing the Harrigan song to our last name, declaring “Proud of all the Irish blood that’s in me, in me!” Oh, the irony.

The other half is that, were people to look at me, they might begin speaking Tagalog expecting me to launch in the language, sans accent. Unfortunately, I could not maintain that language, nor the culture as I had no one who observed these traditions when I was young. Even New Haven, CT in the ‘80s, with Yale University as a backdrop, was not the hotbed of Southeast Asian culture. And although there was one family and a lady at church, I was not exposed enough to maintain the language, nor absorb the culture. So, Irish American it is!

So, back to looking how I look, as I searched for jobs, I acknowledged the unstated need to prove my accent was not too thick and/or I could speak English well enough. Early on in my career, a recruiter actually stated that first step out loud! (Imagine his surprise when someone who went through the American educational system could actually speak American? But I digress!)

I got jobs, so my English must have been adequate. Overcoming the indignation was the easy part. After all, there wasn’t much I could do about how people reacted to me. Why even try? Eliminating my defensiveness and need to prove I belonged was much harder entirely. And until a colleague brought this up recently, I hadn’t realized that I had developed a method that (1) prepared all aspects of me professionally and (2) endeavored to control how I am evaluated by the outside world. Much as I tried to separate the professional from the personal, my world was and continues to be more integrated than that stark division.

My method was particularly helpful when I first entered the job market or worked with new recruiters and companies. Leaving nothing to chance, I controlled what I could control so that I could address last-minute issues that inevitably came up during in-person interactions. As my consulting career progressed, the steps I took to show I belonged became second nature, honed and improved after each successful or unsuccessful assignment.

Now, I can share my method:

• I ensure that I look like I could belong in the workplace by selecting a dark, conservative suit for the interview or job fair. I leave behind my desire for “some pop of color,” reserving color for after I get hired. Regardless of how I bristle at the thought, now is not the time to display my personality. How I dress is within my control, and my well-fitted, clean, and polished suit feels like putting on armor.
• Makeup is not usually part of my daily routine. But for in-person events, I apply light makeup to look and feel put together. Going to a job fair recently, I walked out my front door strutting and overflowing with confidence simply by dressing and acting the part!
• Desiring to portray an image of knowing how to play the game, I bring along business cards. Having them at the ready to hand over to someone makes me feel totally professional.
• Small but impactful, I print the resumes I will distribute on fancy paper. In fact, recently, my career coach and I were reminiscing about purchasing special paper at the last minute. I hadn’t realized this was still impactful until I gave a recruiter my resume, and she commented on the feel of the paper. Already, I stood out, all because of fancy paper!
• For someone who looks like me, I often anticipate defending my language skills. Toward this end, I ensure that all my communications (cover letters, thank you notes, text messages, and matrices) are written using proper grammar. I hadn’t realized using proper grammar was unusual until an email recipient commented on it. He was surprised?
• I am often told I don’t have an accent, but others do. And the tendency to think that an accent implies less comprehension is frustrating. Recently, when discussing interviews with my mentee, she questioned whether her English was understandable. I had never had trouble understanding her. So, I confirmed multiple times that her English was understandable and sufficient. She graduated from an American university! Particularly pertinent to me is how easily a simple “Excuse me?” or “I didn’t understand that” can erode my confidence in my ability to communicate and convey myself. And I wonder if this happened to her, as I could hear this doubt in my mentee’s voice. I encouraged her confidence in communication skills. I assured her that I had no trouble at all.

It’s 2026, and I am in a new metropolitan area, searching for a new role without local contacts. I recently attended a job fair, employing every step of the method described above.

This time, perhaps my decades of experience and years of writing are sufficient to convince the hiring world of my communications skills.

Perhaps, too, my decades of experience and years of writing reassure me that I belong in these organizations.

Looking the way I look!